Activating sex-life after giving birth

Your sex life is another part of your life that will change as you adjust to being parents. Learning to share and care about each other in a new way can deepen your relationship, and allow you to find each other again.

A new baby turns a woman into a mother, a man into a father, and a couple into a family. But the “couple” is still there.

Some couples have trouble working out a new relationship that feels good to both of them. You are not alone. As it was during pregnancy, good communication is the key. Talk about how you feel. Be as open with each other as you can. A sense of humor helps, too.

Most new mothers are ready to have intercourse when their stitches have healed and the discharge from their vagina is clear. Couples often try new positions to help them cope. Many new mothers are so tired that they lose interest in sex. Many new fathers feel the same way. If mothers are going through postpartum blues, this will also reduce their interest in sex.

We all need to be touched and held. Many new mothers find that caring for the baby meets their need to be touched. They find that they have little left for their partner. This can upset a man who is used to a close and warm relationship.

Why do babies seem to wake up just when you start to make love? This makes some people think they should forget about sex. Remember that your baby will soon be sleeping all night, or at least long enough for you to enjoy yourselves.

All of these feelings will pass. Talk to each other. Say “I love you” often. Try to keep romance alive by spending time alone with each other. Going for a walk, driving in the car, or going out for coffee can help remind you that you are friends and lovers as well as parents.