GENTLEMAN, ARE YOU FACEBOOK FRIENDS WITH HER?

TANGA: I see you post many photos on Facebook looking dappa these days

MWANZA: Oh yeah, on Facebook and Instagram too


TANGA: I see they are getting lots of likes, especially from women

MWANZA: Absolutely, women love it. Check out what this one has commented on my latest pic, "Mmmh, you are looking good hunk. Your pants look full at the middle. You must be packing a good tool wink wink"

(Mwanza laughs)

This women will be the end of me, I swear

TANGA: How come I don't see your wife commenting or liking your pictures online?

MWANZA: That's because we're not Facebook friends, neither does she follow me on Instagram

TANGA: Why bro? Why?

MWANZA: Just like that. I need my space

TANGA: What?! That is messed up. So, you marry your wife, you have kids with her, she is the woman you have slept with countless of times, you share the same bed with her, she knows you inside out and yet you are uncomfortable being Facebook friends with her? Really?

MWANZA: You make it sound like it's a big deal

TANGA: It is. Last time I checked, your settings are only visible to your Facebook friends. I can imagine how she feels being locked out of your world. Or doesn't she want to be your Facebook friend?

MWANZA: She does. In fact, we used to be Facebook friends but I removed her when she started complaining about my social media behavior

TANGA: Yes, because you flirt with ladies. I bet even all these new photos you are posting are to seek the attention of ladies. Right?

MWANZA: Right

TANGA: Bro, you are behaving like a teenager. Come to think of it, you once told me you have a pseudo account for flirting, you called it your alter-ego where you can say anything you want. This is childish. You are a father, a husband. You should be using your online presence to make meaningful friendships, for networking in an honorable way; but above all, to celebrate your family

MWANZA: You're beginning to sound like my wife

TANGA: Well, your wife is right

(Tanga's phone beeps)

Oh. My wife has tagged me to a photo on Facebook

(Tanga smiles looking at his phone screen)

This is beautiful

"Thank you my love, this was such a special day. I love you too" (Tanga types as a comment on the photo he has been tagged to)

MWANZA: Your wife?

(Tanga shows the photo to Mwanza)

TANGA: Yes, it's a photo of our son's seventh birthday. This is so precious. Look at the way we are laughing, my cavity is even showing. It was a great day. That boy has grown

MWANZA: You all look happy

TANGA: We were. This is how to use Facebook as a family man. Your marriage and family should be everything. Those women who flirt with you, write to you exciting stuff and make you feel good; they won't last. Some months or years down the line, they'll get bored with you, they'll find another man who looks more dappa than you, or they will get into serious relationships or marriages and you will be forgotten; but when you look back at your Facebook wall, back at your life; you would rather see memories of your family. Your family is growing, the world is aging; fill your time lime with the important stuff

MWANZA: (Picking up his phone) You're right bro. I am deleting my pseudo account and sending my wife a friend request

Story by: © Dayan Masinde and Akello Oliech
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