Remember the ‘guy from (part 1)’ As you know, things started out pretty casual with him and me, the sex was hot, the wine was smooth, and the pillow talks were strong. As time progressed we found ourselves stepping out of the bounds of casual sex and began making drunken pinky promises that we’d never forsake one another. Promising that he will leave his wife for me. We built proverbial contracts and licked each other into commitment.

The fact is, I’ve been, “the other woman,” many nights passed thinking that we had something special but sadly, like all other men, they only care about their relationship to my vagina.

If I’m honest, my ego and self-importance are what kept me on the phone. I’d gather myself in my blankets and listen to their rage as if I wasn’t the one that caused it. I’ll be the first to acknowledge that my shrivel of validation rested in the thrill of making other women’s men ejaculate...

I considered myself a triple threat; good pu**y, good conversation, and good looking. I wanted to exercise my powers the way Curry exercises his 3 point magic. If being a homewrecker was my only talent than I would be hard bent to give that up. I wanted to go to the big league, I wanted to find rich men that I could dazzle with my wit and whisk away. I didn’t care that I was insecure or that I left behind me a litter of bitter women, I wanted to win at something, and I wanted to be happy.

Don’t get me wrong, I felt pity and concern for the “main” woman or wife, but any guilt I had wasn’t enough to placate my whore ambitions.

The uncomfortable truth is that, “the other woman,” represented our demise. “The other woman,” represented power. “The other woman,” controlled the devout woman’s fate and ultimately, “the other woman,” made a choice that would cement our futures.

So I did everything within my capacity to make this ‘Side’ relationship a comfort zone for him so that he would at least have that as a consideration if he ever decided to make a choice.

As time went by, my relationship with him grew deeper, yet there were still no signs of him leaving her. A silent frustration began to kick in. Then I became obsessed with HER, wondering why the heck he couldn’t just walk away from her when I could clearly see that he really wanted to be with me.

The discontent I felt began to manifest itself in my expression toward him, and all of a sudden, I wasn’t so patient anymore. Then slowly, I began to think less and less of myself as I reckoned that if he wasn’t choosing me, then it was because his GF was better than me, so there must be something terribly wrong with me.

This crack in my self-esteem progressively became deeper, and soon I was looking for the affirmation from other guys that WANTED to be with me.

I had nothing to do with any of them of course; I was way too devoted to my Mr. Unavailable for that. But I needed them. I needed to hear from them that I was desirable; I needed to see the approval and want in the eyes of another man, to affirm my own worth.

It didn’t matter to me that Mr. Unavailable treated me like a Princess regardless of the situation; for me it was simply a case of “If I mean THAT much to you, then why are you not holding MY hand in public”.

My life became all about this relationship. All I saw myself as at some point was as a ‘Side Chick’ and nothing more. I defined everything about myself, even in my head, from the perspective of me being a ‘Side Chick’.

Being a ‘Side Chick’ is by far the most difficult thing I have EVER had to do in my life.

It should go without saying that my side chick chronicles end here because I get it now, I never want a woman to suffer just because of my selfish desires. I am officially out the game.

I guess you have seen through (part 1), that I have the mind, power and technical know-how to be a ‘Side-Chick’, nevertheless I say to you that it’s not a desirable position to be in at all.

True Love is free from all Compromise!

To be honest, there was no glory in side-chicking or deception, only pain, and an illusion. I have a lot of souls searching to do before I can be anybody’s anything.
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