He thinks "if she doesn't talk about it, everything must be fine". Well. It's not fine.


Sad black woman

My husband is sending dick pics to other girls

We got married in September after almost 7 years together. I lost friends and ignored red flags the whole time we were dating because I finally felt loved. I still love him. He says he loves me and I believe him. He shows me he loves me every day.

Part of me is overly logical "they're just pics". I justify it by saying things like "he still comes home to me. If he wanted to be with someone like that, he would be".

Part of me takes comfort in the fact that what he sends out, almost never gets a reply. Like he gets off more on sending them rather than getting pics back." Well, at least they're ignoring him".

Part of me feels like I'm dying inside. Slowly fighting and losing the battle with my darkest thoughts. "He's only with you because it was easy".

I've been suicidal recently. I finally told him and he comforted me. Another justification "this is escapism. I'm not an easy person to love".

I don't want to divorce. I love him more than anything. Too many people spent too much money to make sure our wedding day was beautiful. It's only been 4 months. I'll be the girl who moves back to her mother's house. Unemployed. Divorced at 24. I'm sure there would be a line of people waiting to say "I told you so".

He insists that it's separate from our love together. Like it's purely about getting off. There's "no connection," he says. It works enough to shut me up because I don't want to talk about it either. I think "if I don't talk about it, it'll go away". He thinks "if she doesn't talk about it, everything must be fine". Well. It's not fine.
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