My Girlfriend attempted to commit suicide


African woman sleeping

My mind isn't clear on everything. I was on the verge of a mental breakdown when it all happened. She's been through a lot lately. Family issues, school, social life and more. It's a long distance relationship. It'll be 3 months on the first of January. Something about her was just so magnetic. I never intended to fall for her, I had sworn off long distance relationships. But she found the way through each barrier. She's a great person, she knows how to make someone laugh, she's very compassionate and everyone I know wants to be around her and meet her.

She sent me a message a few minutes ago, saying she's working it out, whether she should or not, and that she'll talk to me soon. Her behavior got odd, something in her words was throwing me off. I asked her to please be honest and upfront and tell me what happened. My fears were true, she made another attempt and this one almost succeeded. She felt sick and was woozy, but patched her arm back up and went on with my friend and me to play games. He didn't know, but he knew I was acting strangely. I just played it off that I didn't feel good. I'm terrified of losing her. She makes me feel like I matter. I want her to be happy, I want to show her that there is so much in the world for her to experience. I know I can't cure her depression, I know I can't make everything suddenly better. But I want to do what I can for her and show her what life has to offer her.

I just went back and re-read some of the messages. Our social platform had an outage so some messages didn't load until now. She forgot to take her medication and had a really bad day. That may have been what started all this.

I don't know if I can relax after all this. She assures me that everything is fine and that's she's not going anywhere. She just made a mistake.

I don't know what to do. I don't know how to proceed things. I'm trying to keep cool and level-headed, but this whole situation has me fucked up. I'm fucking terrified. I don't want to seem selfish. She's done so much for me that she doesn't realize, and I want to do the same for her. What do I do? I don't even know if I should post this, it feels strange. It's early in the morning right now, and I have yet to hear from her since last night's events. She may be sleeping in, I figure she lost quite a bit of blood, she was really woozy last night. The worst part is I'm the only one who knows about this, I don't know where else to go, but I need to get this out of my system so I can move on, I can't do anything in this state.

Ever since I heard your voice, and saw how beautiful your smile was, I started falling for you. You stole my heart, and I need you in my life. Things will get better, I promise. They just take time.
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