This suicide note, by the Tala Girls student who hanged herself, makes me sad!

This suicide note, by the Tala Girls student who hanged herself, makes me sad!

This suicide note, by the Tala Girls student who hanged herself, makes me sad! Sad because you can not undo death. It strikes with finality. She was accused of theft, and maybe she thought no one will ever understand her, and would stand accused for the time she spent in that school. It is very easy for students to make snide remarks.

On the weight of that matter, suicide doesn't come up as the right recourse. Not that there are situations that warrant it. People have different breaking points. When you reach there, anything is possible. Your thought process becomes narrow. You settle on the first answer that comes to mind. You even start liking it. It is the path to your peace and freedom. Death is one of those answers. Instead of fearing it, you welcome it. Other people take to drugs.

Some years ago, I found myself jobless and my food supplies depleted. I was "sitting" on the deposit and the month was ending. I had nowhere to go except to go back home. But I didn't contemplate that. I thought if I go back home, people would sneer at me. I became so thin overnight and I could feel the early stages of ulcers. I remembered I had a relative in Makindu who had a big herd of livestock. I planned to go there and become his employee. That was better than going back home!

I nursed this idea for two days until I liked it. I was now seeing a clear path of peace and tranquility, away from the brutal and unforgiving life of the city. But before I took action, I told a friend what I intended to do. He looked sympathetic, but he was also living with a relative, so he couldn't help me. In any case my mind was set for Makindu. My friend and I parted ways in the evening after a lot of contemplations.

Two days later, he visited me with some rather good news. "Kasee, remember that interview I did last month?" I have been told to report to work on Monday. So, you aren't going anywhere. I have a friend who lives in a hostel, I have already talked to him to host you for a month, as we look for a rental." It was a sigh of relief. It was on a Friday, and I was set to travel to Makindu the following day, Saturday. I didn't even have fare. The landlord would evict me on Monday.

Within that month, while still "pirating " at the hostel, an opportunity came through and I jumped to it. At the end of the month we moved to a rental, my friend and I. We famously called that room Bird's Nest. I am now a very strong-willed person, with a skin thicker than that of an armadillo. No situation fazes me, as none is permanent.

There is always a light at the end of the tunnel, guys. Giving up should not be an option.

May Dokee Rest in Peace!

#TalesOfTheSeeker as narrated by Boniface Kilonzo

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